The Fool Rankings
Which airline is most foolish right now. Scores are out of 10, higher is worse. It's comedy and opinion; the Fool Index has the receipts.
- 1
Frontier
The Spirit tribute bandSame hits, different animal on the tail. Now that the original act broke up, it's the headliner.
- 2
United
Paperwork about your paperworkWill lose your bag, then lose the form about losing your bag.
- 3
American
Your bag is in CharlotteYour luggage is having a great time in Charlotte. It doesn't miss you.
- 4
Allegiant
Departs Tuesdays, probablyFlies to cities you've never heard of, at times no human has ever chosen on purpose. Now owns Sun Country.
- 5
Southwest
Assigned seating griefFifty years of sit anywhere. Now there's a chart, and the regulars are not okay.
- 6
JetBlue
Free Wi-Fi, emotional turbulenceThe Wi-Fi works. Everything else is a vibe and a prayer.
- 7
Delta
Smug mode activatedMostly on time and will not stop bringing it up. The lounge line reaches the parking garage.
- 8
Alaska
Too polite to roastGenuinely hard to make fun of. Now it runs Hawaiian too, so it's hard to make fun of in two time zones.
Vibes
How it feels to fly them: fee creativity, snack disappointment, gate change energy. Updated monthly by people who fly these airlines too. We fly these airlines too. That's the problem.
Receipts
The Fool Index scores every airline on DOT complaints, cancellations, lost bags and bumping. Sometimes the data agrees with us. Sometimes it doesn't.
See the Fool Index →Spirit Airlines, 1992 to 2026
The bright yellow ransom note. Ceased operations on May 2, 2026. Survived by its fees, which are presumably still out there somewhere. In lieu of flowers, the family requests $34 for seat selection.